I was blaming God for what happened last week and I really wanted to quit everything, I wanted to stop breathing and join him in the everlasting. But slowly I am beginning to see that the ripple effect that would cause would not solve the problem, and it is not what he would want. So I am reflecting on the cruelty of this world that we are living in. I can't put the loss into perspective. How does the world lose someone this young and vibrant, with so many aspirations and dreams. What are our dreams? Are they things that we can actually obtain, are they things that were are supposed to aspire too. I was once told that our genuine ambitions are the manifestations of the God driven plan for our lives. But if this is so why would we not be allowed to reach this destinations. To be close but yet so far away to me is unacceptable. I feel that I need to reach my goals, everyone that I set for myself, and if I was not to reach these goals then I have failed in this life.
Next week will be one of the most trying times that I have ever had in life. Not because I will begin the first of my medical school exams, but because my family is cripple and hurting. My only wish today this first Sunday is for HEALING.
Healing to course through the veins of my soul and also of through the souls of my family members.
Healing for my uncle who lost the only child of his seed, healing for my aunt who lost her baby, and healing for my cousin (his sister) who is lost in a tunnel of despair and is finding it hard to return to us.
I ask that everyone pray a pray of HEALING for my family, and for those who have already, please continue to do so . Thank You.
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