Crazzzyyy Chiren

I am stuck in the madness in the "A". The children that I am working with this summer are really on some different stuff.... they are unmotivated and just looking for the next party. Unfortunately this was not what I had signed up for. When Crunch time comes they should buckle down and do what needs to be done. Instead they complain..... I don't know what's wrong with this generation.

So I have some serious dilemmas in the male sector. First I have been dreaming about Z. That is not a good thing because it makes me want to call and just talk to him. So I was sitting in my room last night talking with a friend and they were like " why don't you just call him". I mean to me that sounds great because I really would like that opportunity to talk with him again, but I know that it would probably not be a good idea and among everything else I might get hurt again..... But there are definitely some strong feelings still there.
The other person that I cannot explain is "R", he has been playing the relaxed," i'm working hard" card. But I know that he is still talking to some girl that goes to Brenau and that he will not tell me about her because he doesn't want me to know or he feels like has something to lose. Although right now we don't have much of anything anyway.

Since I have been in the "A" I had come across two new individuals to add to the mix. Both of their names begin with "B" so my nomenclature isn't going to work. But the first one is older, loves kids ( which is why he is working for this program), and just generally handsome. The other is younger (very young), sweet, and generally a flirt.

The problem with the younger "B" is that he is a flirt and I can't reconcile his playfulness with being just that"playfulness". Secondly he is extremely young and that has caused me to pause because I really didn't think that he was that young. Let's just say that if I wanted to go out with him we couldn't go because of his age.
The problem with the older "B" is that he really is playing games and his is denying everything... so even though I really like him I can't live with the games. Thats the whole reason that I had to leave "Z" alone and I refuse to place myself back in the same position on purpose all over again. ( but he is so adorable)

I think that I have reached that point where I am tired of being alone again...... but I don't want to talk to someone for all the wrong reasons. I really wish that this was easier.